My Testimony
My testimony did not come to me overnight. It took more than a year for me to recognize my patterns of sin and begin learning what it truly meant to believe in God, trust Him completely, and surrender to His timing. Through a wonderful program called ReGeneration, I began a journey of discovering who I had become while trying to live life on my own—and how, in the process, I had been betraying myself and the person God created me to be.
During those 12 steps, I learned what it meant to admit my sin patterns, believe that God could fully restore me, trust His timing, and look honestly at the past—both the ways I had been hurt and the ways I had hurt others. I learned to confess, repent, forgive, make amends, and continue turning my life over to Him. In fact, I did not write my testimony until I had completed the program and was asked to share it publicly in front of a group. It lasted a little over 15 minutes—okay, maybe 20—but I did it. When I finished, I felt relieved. It felt good to speak honestly about what God had done and was continuing to do in my life.
Below is the shortened version of my testimony.
Hi, my name is Wendy, and I have a new life in Christ. I am in recovery for co-dependency, people-pleasing, and grief.
For most of my life, I was a performer—known for being strong, compassionate, and dependable. I believed it was my responsibility to protect everyone, prevent conflict, and hold relationships together. I spent decades tending everyone else’s garden while neglecting the one God entrusted to me: my own heart.
I grew up in a loving but complicated family shaped by addiction, betrayal, and resentment, which left me carrying fear, anger, and burdens I was too young to hold. I learned to watch closely, anticipate problems, and manage whatever I could. I called it love and loyalty, but underneath were fear, pride, control, and self-reliance.
At 24, I placed my faith in Jesus as my Lord and Savior. I belonged to Him, but I continued living as though everything depended on me. Two decades later, God used my neighbor Libby to lead me to ReGeneration, a Christ-centered 12-step recovery program.
Soon after I began ReGen, my mother was diagnosed with stage-four metastatic cancer. I moved into my childhood home to oversee her hospice care, once again leaving my own family to manage without me. I arranged for everyone to say goodbye, but did not make space to sit with her myself. She went to be with God in 2025.
After her death, Psalm 23 became personal: “The Lord is my shepherd…He restores my soul.”
I realized I had spent my life trying to shepherd everyone else, but I was not their shepherd. God was. Through ReGen, God revealed the patterns I had disguised as strengths. I had called control “love,” enabling “helping,” fear “responsibility,” and exhaustion “strength.” During inventory and confession, I faced both the ways I had been hurt and the ways I had hurt others. In Step Six, I surrendered the Protector role I had worn since childhood and prayed, “Jesus, You are my Protector. Forgive me for trying to do Your work instead of trusting You.”
Today, recovery has not made me perfect. It has made me more honest about how much I need Jesus. I am learning to pray before reacting, care without controlling, help without rescuing, and love without abandoning myself. I am learning that boundaries are not punishment and that I can own my part without controlling another person’s response. I now picture recovery as tending a garden. First Corinthians 3 reminds us that one person plants and another waters, but God gives the growth. I am not the Master Gardener. My responsibility is to stay rooted in Christ through prayer and Scripture, allow Him to remove what chokes healthy growth, and trust Him with the results.
As I bring my fear, resentment, shame, and grief into His light, He continues cultivating love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control in me.
Praise God for the healing, growth, and new life He is cultivating in my heart.